Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
