Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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