I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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