it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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