I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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