doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
God I need to hump something, right now.
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