I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
