Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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