I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
