I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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