? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
