Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
