very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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