So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
