Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
