You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
