I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
