MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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