i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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