what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
