i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Randomize
