Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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