next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I intend to get homeless drunk
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
