In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize
