new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
