96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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