I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
