It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
