i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
