i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
