I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
