OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
