I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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