it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
