I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
