the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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