D3 body, D1 cock
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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