My Higher Power is John Stamos
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize