there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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