I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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