That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
