i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
