she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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