New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
