just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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