You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize
