Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
