either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
