I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Randomize
