NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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